40) Nadine – Beginning our Life Together

In the last post you read about my leaving the comfort of a full-time job as Manager of The San Francisco Residence Club to go out and sell paint for Sherwin Williams. In this post you will read about Nadine, and my incredible luck in selecting her as my wife.

Growing Closer

By late 1979, Nadine and I were very much in love and trying different living arrangements. First, we shared a room at the residence club. Nadine then wanted to have the experience of having her own apartment and rented a small studio on Stockton street, just around the corner from The San Francisco Residence Club. I then moved in with her and continued to work at different gigs while Nadine took a job at Ingersoll Rand as a file clerk.

Apartment Manager

We had the idea that if we could find a job managing an apartment building, we could save money by not paying rent or owing a car. So that is what we did, answering an ad and taking a position as Apartment Managers at a 6-story building on Van Ness at Lombard Street working for a retired medical physician and his wife.

Marriage to Nadine

OliverandNadineWeddingOn April 11, 1980 Nancy and I were married at St. Phillips Episcopal Church in San Francisco, me at 30 years of age and Nancy at 24. It was a small wedding attended only by Nadine’s Mom, Dad, Grandfather and my brother Dean, with a reception held afterwords at Hoolihans in Sausalito in Marin County, just across The Golden Gate Bridge.


Nadine2Finding a woman like Nadine provided me with the stable, loving relationship with a person I felt I had never found. Nadine had completed her undergraduate work in International Studies, had a start on her career, her own interests and a sensible, long-term outlook on decisions in her life; all things which were not yet in place for me. Since I was wanted to be a family man, a major piece of my puzzle was in place and I felt I could now go forward and fill in the others.

Still Searching for a Career

It may surprise the reader to know, in relationships and careers, finding one’s life partner, and one’s life work does not for everyone happen by the time a person reaches their early 20’s, and cannot be arranged to happen in a certain way, no matter how badly a person may desire it. For example, by the time I met Nadine in 1978, at the age of 28, I had already danced my way through several relationships. I had held several jobs but hadn’t found a “career” – much less my “life’s work”.


Back in Minnesota, my Mom was in her 60’s and going out of her mind with worry about me. It had been about 6 years since I left the midwest and most of what she knew, came from other family members. She knew I had experimented with pot and LSD and I didn’t keep in touch, due mainly to my complete insensitivity regarding her feelings. I often regret not staying in touch with her but began seeing her again, after I was more established, during the 1980’s and 90’s. More on that later.

Did your first meeting with your husband or wife strike you like a bolt of lighting?

Next: How Two Simple Part-time Jobs Finally Helped Position Me for Success in College

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